Update

Haven't posted in a while, but a lot has happened. From losing all my friends to losing contact with my family, I don't is this what it feels like to be happy? I just feel like I'm further away now. I'm just a little stronger by keeping myself from crying. But now? It's all hopeless. All those things I said in the past? They're coming true now. The things I thought I was imagining. Now it's all coming true. Not because I told them the truth. Because I made this happen. It was my fault for keeping it in. What could I do, it was the only way.

True thoughts???

As I look around to see
what has happened to me?

I always ask why
as I begin to cry

All the things that happen
Have I learned my lesson?

My heart seems to break
As everyone seems to make

My life so miserable
Giving me a label.

They judge by my one mistake
Why can't I just jump in a lake?

It'll be much faster than living this life
Or why don't I just grab the knife

As I pierce it through my skin
while giving a laugh and grin

And when I see society
I must hide my honesty

Because with the more scars I show
The more labels I glow

Even if it hurts so bad
It's the only way to get rid of sad

To get rid of my broken heart
Trying to fill the empty part.

As I face the world of tomorrow
I hope that I won't show my sorrow

That they won't see I'm hurt
As they put on their little concert

I just seem to sit back
As my bottom hits a tack.

Piercing me for my heart
As I just break apart....

What do you do when no one seems to care anymore?

When you're looking back at memories and you realize how much you miss them and how sad you are because they were taken away from you

Who's there for you when you're the one there for everybody else??

Update

People might guess things have been a lot better over the past few months. The new year has started and I expected some well uh good things to happen. So far that thought not been going so well. I feel lonelier and left out of everything more than ever. I feel abandoned. I only have God now. He is always my friend and protector. I am probably blind not to see them. Them as the two guys that like me. But I choose to not see them. So I won't break their hearts. But the people I love? They are all just slipping away. I just feel lonelier and lonelier. I smile so they can't see me crying and bursting. It is the only way. They don't even care anymore. No matter what they won't ever care. All I do is stay quiet and keep everything inside. Then they all get angry. When I let everything out to please their wishes they just talk about me behind my back. No matter what I do it will be wrong. Just wrong

you froze my heart