*Was just a normal conversation I had with my darling friend Mandy.

Don't worry bout a thing. It's the truth about me.

Mandy I can not take this anymore. I am about to explode. I hate myself, my friends hate me, people hate me, its all too much.

I wanna like disappear from this world. There is too much judgment too much hate and its all just so saddening to me. I can't take it. I wanna hide in a hole and die in there and never come out. Nobody will look for me. Nobody will care I hate life. Everything made up of it. It is too sickening to hear these words and watch as my self esteem drops and drops

Christine

Christine.

Don't say that.

Christine!

Answer me

Christine.

Its true. I try so hard to be nice. And I don't even know why. People don't care. I'm a retard and a bitch there I said it. I swear I am. People don't freaking care

No you're not

I try so hard to be nice to every one of them. I try to make themselves feel good. I try to cooperate

Christine, stop it

We all love you and care for you.

There is nothing to stop! It is just truth coming out

Please. What's wrong?

Christine?

Everything is wrong. People don't like me. I get that. I try to ignore that and they just have to come to my face and say it.

I try so hard to make them feel proud of themselves. I put myself down cause I don't really care

What are you talking about? Everyone thinks you're a good friend. We love you, ok?

They don't even realize what they are doing. I really just wanna disappear from everywhere

Don't. Christine, you're such an amazing person. Stop saying those things

But I can't! The people point it out to me! They tell me directly! I can ignore but not if they do it everyday. Not if they purposely do it

Like I understand you hate me but like then don't talk to me!

Christine

I don't hate you. No one hates you.

I know you don't hate me. Cause you are always there for me. but there are other people who I cannot mention that actually do.

And even if I try to hide and just take it like a man they just come to me and start it again

And now I can't take it anymore

They don't, trust me. You're such a good person. I'm not lying , Christine

I am 100% they do hate me. No matter how hard I try I won't even get close to not being hated. Ugh I hate who I am. Who I have become. I am such an evil person. I can't just like stop. I am such a dumbass

No.

NONONO. Christine.

Don't hate yourself. Ignore them.

You're not an evil person and you're not a dumbass.

Christine

Dont say those things becausethey aren't true.

10:35pm

I can't stop hating myself! I hate myself! I hate how I look and I hate who I am and who I have become. I should just keep thinking low of myself cause that is who I truly am. Just a worker a servant to everybody