Update

People might guess things have been a lot better over the past few months. The new year has started and I expected some well uh good things to happen. So far that thought not been going so well. I feel lonelier and left out of everything more than ever. I feel abandoned. I only have God now. He is always my friend and protector. I am probably blind not to see them. Them as the two guys that like me. But I choose to not see them. So I won't break their hearts. But the people I love? They are all just slipping away. I just feel lonelier and lonelier. I smile so they can't see me crying and bursting. It is the only way. They don't even care anymore. No matter what they won't ever care. All I do is stay quiet and keep everything inside. Then they all get angry. When I let everything out to please their wishes they just talk about me behind my back. No matter what I do it will be wrong. Just wrong